“Little Natalie, never rest until you have uncovered your essential self. Remember that. Somewhere, deep inside you, hidden by all sorts of fears and worries and petty little thoughts is a clean pure being made of radiant colours,” (Jackson 42).
Seventeen-year-old Natalie Waite is eager to start at Bennington College. There she’ll be away from her egotistical father that she conforms to but can’t help but love and her neurotic mother who she resents. But once Natalie finds herself at Bennington the happiness and understanding of who she could be doesn’t come. Natalie doesn’t know how to fit in and finds herself in the company of one of her professors and his wife and a strange new friend trying to find her place and self-amongst it all.
I read Hangsaman as a part of a read-a-thon with a niche Shirley Jackson meme account for about two months. Shirley Jackson is one of my favourite writers, though before the read-a-thon I’d only read two of her novels and a good amount of short stories. But I’d bought a box set of her books a few years ago and Hangsaman was thankfully included in that (though I’m still annoyed the collection didn’t include all of her novels). I went into the read-a-thon blind knowing that it was possibly inspired by a real missing person’s case and nothing else, and honestly blind is the best way to go into this book because I think it’s impossible to accurately describe. It’s a novel that needs to be experienced.
Hangsaman is different from Jackson’s more popular horror novel The Haunting of Hill House and the gothic We Have Always Lived In The Castle. It’s part coming of age, part dark academia, part strange fiction that together is brilliant. I won’t lie that I was confused a lot while reading, and I’m actually considering re-reading it soon to see if I understand it better the second time around. While I enjoyed participating in the read-a-thon it felt like I was reading a different book when following along to each weekly assigned section. I don’t expect the book to become more coherent reading it straight through, but I am curious if it will be less jarring that way.
Still, this was a wonderful book. Tense and surreal at times, casually horrifying at others. Hangsaman perfectly encapsulates a feeling of imposter syndrome throughout, of struggling to relate to and understand the others around you and yourself. Natalie is a wonderful protagonist to follow, strange and aching, lost and wandering. Following Natalie hurt sometimes but I was amazed by how relatable a protagonist she was to read from. But mostly I was surprised by how the book touched me once it ended.
Hangsaman is an underrated classic of Shirley Jackson’s. I won’t stop you from reading her more popular works, but don’t skip out on this one!
Publisher: Arcturus
Pages: 256 pages (Paperback)
Source: Owned
Genre: Fiction, Gothic, Horror
My Rating: ⛤⛤⛤⛤
Summary:
Seventeen-year-old Natalie Waite longs to escape home for college. Her father is a domineering and egotistical writer who keeps a tight rein on Natalie and her long-suffering mother. When Natalie finally does get away, however, college life doesn’t bring the happiness she expected. Little by little, Natalie is no longer certain of anything—even where reality ends and her dark imaginings begin. Chilling and suspenseful, is loosely based on the real-life disappearance of a Bennington College sophomore in 1946.
Sarah O'Connor 